“We Need A Win!” Says Dad About To Suit Up And Play In Son’s 1st Grade Soccer Game

CRUMB FIELD — Local Dad, Jasper Curtains, is going to have to suit up and play for his first grade son Timmy unless his son starts taking the Lil' Sprouts town soccer game seriously.

“Get the ball!” yelled Jasper to 6 year old Timmy as the little sprout followed other players around the field. “We need a win! It’s second quarter, two minutes left!” continued Jasper as Timmy began chasing a butterfly around in circles.

“Timmy has left me no choice, I’m going to have to throw on a uniform and take his spot, someone’s gotta make a move!” said Jasper as he put on shin pads that went up to his ankle, “Otherwise I don’t know how this team is going to win!” said Jasper as Timmy stopped to sip a juice box saying it was snack time. 

“Hustle!” yelled Jasper as the referee reminded the parents it was just a game.

“Just a game!” yelled Jasper “would you be saying that if this was the World Cup?! Because it just might be!” said Jasper as he ran onto the field and quickly kicked the ball in the net.

“Goal!” yelled Jasper as he jumped around the field giving high fives to Timmy’s team. 

Coach Bianca Kensington said it's not the first time she's seen a parent interfere in their kid's soccer game.

“Parents like Jasper get an adrenaline rush when they see a ball rolling around the field which reminds them of their glory days of being on the field. There’s at least one Jasper per team but unfortunately his kick didn’t technically go in the net, it hit Timmy’s hand on the way which would count as a handball—nullifying the goal and possibly getting the whole team a foul."

Jasper was seen hustling down the field dribbling the ball like he was David Beckham while Timmy ate animal crackers on the sidelines saying “that’s my dad!”