Former 7th Grade Class President Running For Mayor Makes Campaign Promise For Extra Long Recess, Cookies For Breakfast, And $10 Million For Everyone

THE BLEACHERS — Former seventh grade class president, Ernie Poplar, in a bid for town mayor, made the same campaign promises he made in 2002 such as extra long recesses, cookies for breakfast and $10 million dollars for everyone in town during a speech down at the bleachers Friday morning.

“I don’t want to brag but these promises won me the title of Class President in seventh-grade unanimously. Mayor should be a cakewalk," said Ernie confidently as he also looked into a town-wide ordinance that would ban homework for residents.

"No homework? Ever again? I'm intrigued," said resident Chet Puppins who hasn't had homework in over 15 years. "He's got my vote."

Ernie displayed a box of cookies at the podium to show "cookies for breakfast isn't just a pipe dream, it'll be a reality with me as mayor," said Ernie as he declared snickerdoodles as of right now the official breakfast in town.

"He won me over once he pledged cookies for breakfast," said resident Sandy Wilson even though she literally can eat them anytime for breakfast as she is an adult.

Sandy and Chet, also both former classmates of Ernie's, discussed Ernie's 2002 class president term in which he also promised no more school ever, mountains of ice cream everyday for everyone and $50 million each.

"He didn't deliver on any of his promises in 2002 but the school got in the way, you know bureaucracy stuff," said Chet confident Ernie will deliver this time around. "I don't know where he's getting $10 million for each resident but I'm sure he already has that worked out."