Woman Who Walks Outside In High Pollen Count Looks Like Piece Of Buttered Popcorn After .1 Seconds

SYCAMORE AVE — Despite warnings of the high pollen count from meteorologists, a woman, Charlotte Mavis, was seen naively dismissing the forecast walking outside her home only to be taken by a pollen cloud of microspores .1 seconds after opening the door leaving her looking like a piece of buttered popcorn.

Neighbors reported the second Charlotte stepped outside the pollen clung to her like glitter on glue and it wasn’t long before she was wholly coated with yellow dust like a freshly popped kernel at a movie theater.

“You can’t outrun it!” yelled fellow neighbor Chet Puppins who was also coated in pollen himself like a piece of corn on the cob. “You can’t escape it no matter what you do!” he continued as his wife talked to him through a window to keep him calm. 

Charlotte made matters worse when she stepped on a daffodil which caused a cloud of pollen dust to swarm the entire neighborhood where a dachshund was seen attempting to outrun the pollen cloud only to end up coated in the yellow dust like a ballpark corn dog.